


it’s too hard(it’s too easy)

by doctorsimmonswilson



Category: Grey's Anatomy
Genre: Angst with a Happy Ending, F/M, Hurt, Light Angst, Songfic, Songfic: Cruel Summer by Taylor Swift
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-08-26
Updated: 2020-08-26
Packaged: 2021-03-06 14:47:18
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 767
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/26130628
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/doctorsimmonswilson/pseuds/doctorsimmonswilson
Summary: It’s cruel, how hard love is.
Relationships: Alex Karev/Jo Wilson Karev
Comments: 2
Kudos: 6
Collections: jolex x taylor swift week





	it’s too hard(it’s too easy)

**Author's Note:**

> day 3! lover! enjoy!

_fever dream high  
in the quiet of the night  
you know that i caught it_

Jo Wilson falls in love with Alex Karev when the tree falls through the window. But she falls in love with him when he tucks her into bed, and when he stops her from doing something irrational, and when he teaches her, and when he gives her a look that can’t possibly be platonic affection.

_bad bad boy; shiny toy with a  
price, you know that i bought it_

She knows she shouldn’t like Alex Karev. Not in the romantical ‘please kiss my face off’ way. He’s an ass. He isn’t the person who is going to lick her wounds or say soft things to her. He sleeps around for the sex, he’s an ass to nearly everyone for the sake of it, and he doesn’t respect her relationship with Jason.

But Alex isn’t Jason or Paul. Underneath his absolute neanderthal behavior, Jo can tell that he wouldn’t hurt her, at least not in the way that they hurt her— the worst way. She can tell even if he’s not going to whisper her sweet nothings as they fall asleep, he won’t hurt her. And Jo thinks she can live with that; because the fear she can live without. 

But he’s still not an angel, and he’s inconsiderate, and he’s difficult to get through to. She decides to overlook that.

_and it's new  
the shape of your body, it's blue  
the feeling i've got  
and it's ooh, whoa oh  
it's a cruel summer_

Jo Wilson quickly learns she loves Alex Karev just as much as he loves her. It’s like feeling rain on a hot summer night. A refuge from the heat, a calming sensation for your mind. It’s like a glass of water when your throat is dry. 

And the sex...oh my god the sex. Jo thinks Alex’s slutty behavior may serve her well, because he is well versed in the art of loving another person wholly. It’s hot, and it makes her feel sexy, wanted. His hands up and down her thighs, his mouth on her neck. 

Jo loves Alex, and Alex loves Jo. All the time, everywhere; in every way. It becomes a fact in her mind, imprinted in her memory. 

_hang your head low  
in the glow of the vending machine  
i’m not dying (oh yeah, you're right, i want it)  
we say that we'll just screw it up in these trying times  
we’re not trying (oh yeah, you're right, i want it)_

The crux of Jo guessing Alex has fallen out of love with her happens with Meredith’s accident; her beating; her assault. Because even though she never would have held him back from caring for Mer, placing her above all else for the time being- it’s not even a question. 

There’s no conversation, nothing. Jo just knows he will put Meredith first...he always does. Jo will never be his priority, love be damned. 

“Hey,” Alex gives Jo a questioning look as he slips a dollar into the vending machine. Jo looks up from the chart she’s reading, a perplexed expression on her face. He hasn’t spoken to her in days.

“Hey,” she replies softly. Alex presses a couple of buttons with his knuckle. Jo taps her pen against her palm, awkwardly staring off.

“You’ve been here all night?” Alex’s eyes soften. 

“Yeah, it’s been a long shift,” Jo sighs, pressing her lips together. Alex grabs the chips from the drop slot in the vending machine. 

He holds them out to her, “For you.” 

“Thanks,” Jo nods. Alex nods back, walking off. Jo is left in the wake, more confused. 

_and i cried like a baby coming home from the bar (oh)  
said, "i'm fine", but it wasn't true  
i don't wanna keep secrets just to keep you_

Everytime Jo drinks with her friends, everytime she goes to the bar...he’s on her mind. They’re not together, but Jo is still in love with him. She wants to be together. But she’s scared, so afraid; he might hurt her. He’s certainly capable. 

She hates being in the middle of this thing with him and DeLuca. She wants a clean break, a get out of jail free card. She wants to admit to Alex about Paul, her marriage. So, she does. 

_and i screamed, "for whatever it's worth"  
"i love you, ain't that the worst thing you ever heard?"_

Jo Wilson fell in love with Alex Karev after the tree fell, but love is so much more than a moment. It’s cruel, how hard love is.


End file.
